UNCONDITIONAL LOVE
Marriage: The most difficult AND most rewarding of all relationships!
To couples we have mentored or taught in classes over the years, my late husband use to say all the time: Don’t get married if you aren’t willing to die!
What does that mean? Our flesh man doesn’t do well in a relationship that calls for selflessness! Selfishness is our biggest hindrance to a peaceful God centered marriage.
Today we are going to focus on unconditional love in marriage. It doesn’t work any other way.
Our model: Christ.
He loves us unconditionally. There is no If you clean up, talk right, act right, do right, then I will love you. Of course, He loves us too much to leave us and takes us through that process, but we come just as we are.
Likewise in marriage, God wants us to be the Christ in us version of ourselves. You are not the best version of yourself apart from God. There’s more and it’s Him IN us. In and of ourselves we have nothing and can do nothing of eternal value.
BTW
By the way if you have been in Christ for years and years and still walk around wounded and limping, you need to release it to God. Unresolved issues are a huge hinderance to living in the freedom and peace God has provided for us through Covenant relationship. But He loves us unconditionally.
So how do we relate to our less than perfect partner?
Is the continual focus hot button topics, flaws, irritations, disappointments, unmet needs and things that drive you nuts? If so, your focus needs to shift. It’s by and through the Spirit that we are able to love like Christ. We can’t produce it, it’s SUPERNATURAL. But He freely gives us His anointing, which is His presence and power to live full and beautiful lives.
Get Real
Let’s get real here for a minute: When you are that close to anyone in relationship (like marriage) it’s not that we can’t see the imperfections, it’s that IT DOES NOT MATTER. It’s a given, because we are human, but it doesn’t affect the relationship in a negative way. God is bigger.
1 Cor 13: 4-8 Love-Charity
HERE’S THE MEASURING STICK! I’ve heard many say we don’t come with an instruction book; I beg to differ! We have a very detailed instruction manual in fact! How many purchase something that needs to be put together but throws the instructions away or aside because you think you don’t need them? How did that go for you? We have thee best how to manual if only we will follow it!
Love suffers long (PATIENT, forbearing)
and is kind;
love does not envy; (covet)
love does not parade itself, (brag or boast)
is not puffed up; (inflate, prideful)
does not behave rudely,
does not seek its own, (desire or endeavor) There are 119 references to this in scripture! We are self-centered!
is not provoked, (stir up, anger)
thinks no evil;
does not rejoice in iniquity, (unrighteousness)
but rejoices in the truth;
BEARS all things, (covers something difficult to deal with)
believes all things,
hopes all things,
ENDURES all things. (to continue or remain, difficulty, to persevere)
It’s Healing
Unconditional love like the Father loves us actually heals us. When we know how much we are loved, the fight is over, our longing to belong and be accepted is settled in us. The same is true in our love for our spouse. It heals.
Choose to see the beauty without perfectionistic expectations or looking for performance. That is selfish fleshly love that if continued causes big issues and can have bad outcomes.
Celebrate your spouse and watch your marriage flourish. Ask the Lord for His supernatural agape love for your spouse and He will bring it.
Devotion: Study and discuss 1 Cor 13: 4-8 together.
Action: As a couple, discuss issue areas that you can work on together.
Prayer: Father help me to see my spouse as you see them. Fill me with your Spirit that I may love them unconditionally like you do in Jesus name.