First Things First
Things we give our all in: As a business owner, at a job in answering to their employer, on a sports team, as a coach, ministry leader. We produce, prepare, we train, we study. We actually give of our time, talents, our resources. WE SHOW UP. Now in the area of relationship though, it gets a bit dicey.
Relationship can be delightful and it can be hard, depending on the relationship. Family, extended family can be trying… depending. But in the most important relationship of all (human) relationships, are we giving our all; are we focused and are we showing up?
Because if it’s not broke most of us tend to put in more in these different areas than we do with our spouse. Am I right? I mean we get tired and feel everyone and everything wants a piece of us or demands our attention. Then at the end of the day, we get in bed and say a few nice things to each other, exhausted and we pass out. The stresses of life can make us put our marriage last. We do. In certain seasons this is true more than others:
Newlywed season (raise your hand)
Raising Kid(s) season (raise your hand)
Empty Nest season (raise your hand)
Senior Saint season (raise your hand)
We are here to encourage you in whatever season you are in, to be thoughtful to put your first (human) relationship first. Don’t give your spouse your leftovers. Give them your best energy, best time and best talent. Whatever their love language is, their favorite meal is, their favorite restaurant is, their favorite thing is… do that. Weekly. Plan it. If you struggle with this, add it to your calendar. Stopping to get their favorite thing goes a long way to keep the marriage strong, to put first things first.
Young People (raise your hand)
What is your First Thing First?
Predetermine your actions: It’s a NO unless God gives the YES.
2 qualifiers BEFORE you even go looking or reach out.
Do they know the Lord? Are they actually walking with the Lord?
Did you get the YES from God? Is this God’s plan for you?
Set a high bar: You are not for sale; don’t date just to date because feelings and hormones are a funny thing. We were made to love and be loved, so you are gambling with attraction and connection. You can be attracted to the wrong person in one conversation. BIG DEAL if they notice you or try to connect with you; be strong. Seek God BEFORE responding.
What if it takes FOREVER? God is most likely not going to put you with someone until you are ready AND they are ready! You need to be working on yourself, your relationship with God. It’s your preparation season.
YOU DO NOT WANT TO GET MARRIED TO SOMEONE THAT IS NOT YOUR PERSON; IT WON’T GO WELL FOR YOU. WE HAVE TOO MANY TRYING TO UNDO WRONG CHOICES, AND JUST AS MANY TRYING TO WORK IT OUT WHEN IT WASN’T GOD’S PLAN TO BEGIN WITH!
Discussion: How can we put first things first daily and weekly in a practical way?
Study: Gen 2:24, 1 Cor 13
Prayer: Heavenly Father, help us prioritize our marriage making first things first, because right order will keep our marriage strong.