No Back Door

Sacred Covenant

Today we want to highlight a mindset in marriage and that is that marriage is a sacred covenant that is not to be taken lightly.  We live in a throwaway society and culture, where covenants and contracts mean little to nothing.

We Work it Out

Because our marriage is sacred and should be held in the highest regard, the mindset we should have is that no matter how difficult our relationship gets (and it will get tough at times) WE WORK IT OUT.

Decide in Advance

Our mind should be made up in advance that divorce is not an option. We should not give ourselves an out if things get too hard. We should not have a back door mind set. In other words, a backup plan to exit.

Crossroad Not Impasse

There will be crossroads, tough things to walk through, but we need to predetermine that we will walk through them together. Look at it as a crossroad, never an impasse.

Tools

So what are some tools we can have that will help us get along and remain strong in our relationship?

•  Pray together

An article published by the Institute for Family Studies gives a brief overview of some of this research. It explains that a couple’s regular devotion to and shared intimacy with the Creator of the universe can absolutely transform a marriage. Clinical research demonstrates that couples experience a great number of marital benefits when they regularly pray together. It increases forgiveness, emotional and sexual fidelity, relational happiness, trust and unity. It even improves conflict resolution, helping the couple realize that as they have individually been unconditionally forgiven by God, so they’re to forgive others.

• Go to church together

A study released by the Institute of Family Studies (IFS) found that couples who regularly go to church together report higher levels of happiness than those who don’t. More than 3 in 4 regular church-attending couples (78 percent) say they are “very happy” or “extremely happy” in their relationship.

• Keep your covenant: You vowed to honor, cherish, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad until death do you part.

• Keep your commitment (set all your affections on your spouse only.)

• Work on connection & communication (this is BIG.)

• Do check-ins.

• Know how to resolve conflict.

• Never use the “D” (divorce) word.

Devotional

Discussion: What are some ways we can improve our relationship?

Study: 1 Cor 13:5, Love keeps no score of wrongs and Prov 3:3, Never let loyalty and faithfulness leave you. Time them around your neck: write them on the tablet of your heart.

Prayer: Father, help us to have your heart and mind regarding marriage that it is till death do we part, and never even consider not working out our differences. Help us to see our partner as you see them and seek to serve and love them well.